Ask any woman in New York about the dating scene and her response will probably be along the lines of, “It is SO hard.”
The common presumption about dating in NYC is that it must be so much easier than elsewhere because singles have a huge pool to choose from and a myriad of places to meet people. Au contraire, good friends. From clubs to bars to friends’ parties, it can be tough to find a guy who is looking for an actual relationship.
Enter our Friend-of-a-Friend Singles Party.
Our founder, Amanda, realized how rough it is out there and threw the first Friend-of-a-Friend Singles Party in July of 2010. “I met my husband through a friend, and I think going through friends is the gold standard for meeting new people.”
These gatherings actually work, as is evidenced by the success of one of our very own UGS staff members, who prefers to remain anonymous as her story is not just her own. 
She has attended almost every UGS Singles Party since the event’s inception, and this past October things clicked with one of the friends of her UGS friend.
She was simply mingling—as you do—when she saw two guys standing a bit separated from the pack. “I almost walked past them,” she confessed, “and then I was like, ‘Wait, these guys are standing alone. They should be talking to a girl.’ So I literally double-backed and introduced myself.” What followed was a four-month relationship that Miss UGS (as we’ll call her) definitely considers a UGS success.
Of course, not every girl feels they can simply walk up to guys and introduce themselves. Miss UGS believes that it wasn’t just her social way that led her to approach these men, it was the safe and comfortable atmosphere UGS creates. “Even if you’re a little shy … you’re around a great support system,” she says. “You’re around other women that you can talk to. You can talk in groups. It’s just a more comfortable atmosphere.”
Herein lies the genius in the Friend-of-a-Friend concept. You may not feel brave enough to waltz up to random men, but it’s easier to strike up a conversation with another woman—especially if you know her from another UGS event. Since each woman brings her friend, by talking to her you get to talk to him.
If that doesn’t work, try one of our clever icebreakers. Always matched to the theme of the party, the men receive one half of a sentence and the women receive the other half. Throughout the night, you can try and find your match. Once your match is found you each get an entry into the raffle to win fantastic date-themed prizes—anything from toys from Babeland to a restaurant gift certificate.
The biggest perk: the attendees of the party are not just a random group of singles packed into a room. “It’s the best case scenario because it’s the friend of a friend and someone is vouching for that guy,” says Miss UGS. “It’s so much better than just meeting a guy at a random bar.” Amanda, our founder, seconds that: “Friend-of-a-Friend keeps the focus on what we do best—cultivating a group of fabulous women. The guys at our parties are an extension of our women.”
All in all, the UGS Friend-of-a-Friend Singles Party puts some creativity into what can be a monotonous and often times disappointing New York dating scene. “You’ll always hope you’ll meet somebody you’ll click with because it sucks in the city and you just kiss a lot of frogs,” says Miss UGS. “At the very least, you get to talk to really nice people, really interesting people from all different walks of life.” But if you’re lucky—and we hope that you will be—you will become just another UGS success story.
–Ruthie Fierberg
Urban Girl Squad Friend-of-a-Friend Singles Party
Thursday, June 21
8-11pm
Bishops and Barons
243 East 14th Street
Price: $15
*You must purchase two tickets at once, one for you and one for your date-worthy friend*
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